iTunes Shuffle - I Grieve

Oh you lucky person! Tonight you get to experience not one...but TWO wonderful songs from Lj's iPod :).

I heard the first song during my lunch today. It's been a favorite for years, for so many reasons. But as I listened to the lyrics...at that moment in my life, it brought on a whole new meaning for me. See, the thing is, on Friday my best friend is leaving to join the Peace Corp, traveling to South America for the next few years. I'm excited for the adventure and opportunities that await her and her husband, but am also fully aware of the fact that I do not handle loss in a healthy manner. When I was 14, and my grandmother had recently passed away, during her funeral and "after party" I locked myself in my parents bedroom, watching "My Father the Hero" fourteen times in a row...just kept rewinding that VHS :). Completely ridiculous. Although my friend is no where near death, it's still a huge loss in my life. I've never been in love, but I'd consider my relationship with her to be the closest thing to the experience. She's my deepest connection here on earth, and to be without her, I know it's going to take it's toll on me. Before I start crying...on to the first song. I dedicate it to her...:).

"When you come back down" by Nickel Creek

You got to leave me now, you got to go alone
You got to chase a dream, one that's all your own
Before it slips away
When you're flyin' high, take my heart along
I'll be the harmony to every lonely song
That you learn to play

When you're soarin' through the air
I'll be your solid ground
Take every chance you dare
I'll still be there
When you come back down
When you come back down

I'll keep lookin' up, awaitin' your return
My greatest fear will be that you will crash and burn
And I won't feel your fire
I'll be the other hand that always holds the line
Connectin' in between your sweet heart and mine
I'm strung out on that wire

And I'll be on the other end, To hear you when you call
Angel, you were born to fly, If you get too high
I'll catch you when you fall
I'll catch you when you fall

Bridge:
Your memory's the sunshine every new day brings
I know the sky is calling
Angel, let me help you with your wings

When you're soarin' through the air
I'll be your solid ground
Take every chance you dare

I'll still be there
When you come back down
Take every chance you dare,
I'll still be there
When you come back down

**PS, have fun with this video...you might just liken our relationship to that of Frodo and Sam :)**

Haha, I hope you enjoyed that cheese. And that you actually listened to the beauty that is that song :)

Now for the next song on the shuffle, I do give a disclaimer...it's a bit sad. I heard it this evening

on my way home and definitely started some waterworks. I can discern that the song was written

in the context of death, but grieving in itself can take so many forms. I don't think I've allowed

myself to be fully affected yet by the thought that she will be gone for two years. So I imagine that

this song will be one that I can relate to perhaps on Saturday :).

"I Grieve" by Peter Gabriel

it was only one hour ago
it was all so different then
there's nothing yet has really sunk in
looks like it always did
this flesh and bone
it's just the way that you would tied in
now there's no-one home

i grieve for you
you leave me
'so hard to move on
still loving what's gone
they say life carries on
carries on and on and on and on

the news that truly shocks is the empty empty page
while the final rattle rocks its empty empty cage
and i can't handle this

i grieve for you
you leave me
let it out and move on
missing what's gone
they say life carries on
they say life carries on and on and on

life carries on
in the people i meet
in everyone that's out on the street
in all the dogs and cats
in the flies and rats
in the rot and the rust
in the ashes and the dust
life carries on and on and on and on
life carries on and on and on

it's just the car that we ride in
a home we reside in
the face that we hide in
the way we are tied in
and life carries on and on and on and on
life carries on and on and on

did I dream this belief?
or did i believe this dream?
now i can find relief
i grieve

I know that life will carry on...I'm counting on it. But right now, I'm grieving the loss of a most

treasured friend from my daily existence...